Do you all have pics and momentos from "back in the day" that may have a link to an old boyfriend? Whether it's a purse your child's father gave you, old pics of you and an ex, jewelry, etc....
So what do you do with these things when you get in a new relationship? When, if at any time, do you decide to let them go?
Am I wrong for thinking that your mate wanting you to get rid of this stuff anytime before marriage is unjust?
5 comments:
It depends on what the old gift/memento is. Things like purses, clothes, jewelry, yeah I'm probably going to keep if I haven't outgrown it, lost it or it hasn't been just worn out cause I used my Prada bag up! LOL
However, I don't tend to keep pics of old boos. But that's just me. I don't think that everyone has to make that choice and I do have some pics but its not like I'm sitting there lusting for the dude or whatever. I think that everyone is entitled to hang on to whatever memories they want to hang on too whether its a picture or a purse. I can see where some things would be disrespectful like naked pics, pics of you hugged up (and even these would depend on if you had it on display) but other material things--NO.
But if you are pulling out the picture box, ruffling through the cards, and getting weepy over your ex then it may be time to let the stuff go but if you're like me and like to pull out old love letters just for a good laugh at how immature I was back then or crazy I was or in love I was and just recall a fond memory then why should you throw it away?
You're not with that person for a reason, so whoever wants you to let it go should get over their insecurities cause they got you now.
But this is truly up to the individual and the circumstances of the relationship and why you are holding on to whatever you are holding on to.
I agree alot with what Mae is saying. I have alot of stuff from my son's father especially pics...but they are all in Jovanni's photo album. I also have alot of pics, cards and material items from Jay that I haven't gotten rid of. "Boo" also has alot of letters, cards, pics, etc from women he's dated. I can't front, I don't like it but its also not on display.
I think that if we ever lived together, then we would need to get rid of some of that stuff. They are exes for a reason so I'm not insecure about him having the stuff but I don't want that shit in MY/OUR crib.
Pocketbooks, clothes, jewelry, yes, I'll keep it.
Bed, living room furniture, naked pictures...all need to be disposed, especially if we are about to merge lives.
Teddy bears, cards, and stuff like that have to go to. I know men that like to hold on to crap like this, but I don't understand why.
I agree with ya'll a 100%.
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